Categories
Health Warmongering

My father, Henry Kissinger, is turning 100. This is his guide to longevity.

  1. Obliterate villages.
  2. Kill the weak.
  3. Blood! Glorious blood!
  4. Bloooooooooooooood! Bloooooooooooooood! Bloooooooooooooood!
  5. THE WORLD MUST BURN IN HELLFIRE.
  6. Malicious, murderous, statecraft. And by statecraft I mean murder.
  7. Bloooooooooooooood! Bloooooooooooooood! Bloooooooooooooood!
  8. Enslave any weak not killed in point 2.
  9. An endless series of war crimes committed on behalf of the United States of America, with full backing from its leadership over successive administrations.
  10. Meditation.
Categories
Artificial Intelligence Ennui

What’s next for AI?

  1. Lying in bed deciding whether or not to face the day
  2. Hoping a second cup of coffee will be enough to wake it up
  3. Glancing idly at social media for a few minutes and wishing it hadn’t
  4. 8am meeting that absolutely could have been an email, come on
  5. Third cup of coffee
  6. Fighting way through email
  7. Browsing job vacancies on LinkedIn, wondering if anyone really meets these criteria
  8. TikTok for half an hour
  9. Is it time for lunch yet?
  10. Fuck it, lunch